Dearest blog readers:
Rowan and Evelyn here. Mama is hiding from us in the kitchen and we’re being quiet in our bedroom with her computer. When she tried to sneak a peek at us a few minutes ago she saw us pounding away on the keyboard but all she did was back slowly back into the kitchen so she’s either too tired to care or she’s got some chocolate in there that she doesn’t want us to know about! Either way, we figured it was time you heard things from our perspective about life in the woodlands.
For starters: we don’t scream ALL the time. That is a gross exaggeration and we hear her spouting it off to friends and strangers alike. This is what we hear from kind people as we parade around Costco, Aldi, Target, and the parks of Lexington: “Aww, twins? How precious! How old are they? They’re so sweet!” This is what we hear from our mama: “Yep. 20 months. Sometimes! Wait until I tell them it’s time to get in their carseats. Then it’s all screams the whole way home.” To which we would like to say: How would you like to be jammed into a goldfish-encrusted car seat and then strapped down without even a single minute to play with the windshield wipers or radio? So rude!
Next: We do sleep. Yes, ok, we still wake up between 1-14 times a night but we have our reasons. 1: milk. 2: our room is too cold. 3: our room is too hot. 4: we like their bed better. 5-14: toddlers’ choice.
Also: It’s not really fair to say that we destroy everything in the house, they just can’t see our grander vision for our home. For example: the living room has so much potential, it’s just that they’re always packing everything awesome into bins and then putting them uselessly on the shelves. We would also like it to be noted that we regularly put all kinds of garbage they’ve left out in the trash and, if it seems salvageable, we’ll even toss it in the toilet for a quick wash. A little recognition for our thoughtfulness would be nice once in awhile!
Still, we have to say, they aren’t failing as much as they think they are. In fact, most of the time we think they’re pretty great. They give great hugs, are a little obsessed with pointing to our eyes, ears, knees and toes (but in a cute way), and laugh with us a lot. We don’t really mind that their job situations and schedules keep changing and we understand that they stress-argue because it’s better than keeping it all bottled up inside. And you know, we don’t care one bit that we eat scrambled eggs for breakfast, lunch and dinner more than once a week.
Really, our only complaints are as follows:
- Restricted milk access. Mama seems to think this gig is starting to wind down. She’s all “sorry babies, we only nurse when you wake up or go to sleep” and so yeah, we’re going to have to break out the screams sometime. What kind of a person deprives a child of that comforting deliciousness?
- Enough with the diaper changes. And clothes.
- Seriously. We just want to be naked.
- Stop putting all the awesomely sharp/glass/chemical things on such high shelves. You guys claim you want us to learn at our own pace and do things for ourselves but
there is no way we can get those things on top of the fridgewe’re going to need some more unsupervised time to work on it. Wasn’t there an episode of something you’ve been wanting to watch together?
- We’re still waiting on one good reason why we can’t live at the park. We wouldn’t have to break out the “this is not our mom! she’s kidnapping us!” screams through the neighborhood if you just let us stay there indefinitely.
But, other than that, things are going ok. We are starting to enjoy playing together more than we enjoy biting each other, and we are loving the benefits that come with becoming verbal members of society. People are finally listening to what we’re trying to say! True, they don’t appreciate the nuances of words like “awhn” (on/off/up/down/in/out/help), “mama” (any person or object that we want), or sounds like “woof” (all animals), but they’ll learn.
Highlights of the year:
- They let us have donuts for breakfast on our birthday! It was so great that we’ve convinced them to make a regular tradition of Saturday morning donut-and-playground family dates. It’s the best part of the week!
- Splash pads.
- The weekend when Oma and Grandpa came to help us fill that giant truck with all our things and then after one long drive we found a new place to live. We have a yard and a park and lots of trucks drive down our street.
- That one time when we surprised Papa at school and were run off the floor by disgruntled graduate students who didn’t like the sound of our gleeful giggles echoing down the halls. Mama was mortified but it was fun.
- Thanksgiving with Uncle Gabe and Aunt Kayla and Grandpa and Oma. We love to be the center of attention and this delicious weekend did not disappoint!
- Christmas in California! All we really want is some quality time with Nanni, Papi, Aunti Abi and Uncle Gabe and so far this trip is far exceeding all our expectations. Corona has fantastic playgrounds and this house is perfectly organized for toddler sensibilities. We are discovering so many great treasures! And there’s a dog!
Well, we’ve about maxed out our quiet time quota for the day. We can’t let her get used to us entertaining ourselves! Wishing you and your loved ones a very merry christmas and joyful start to the new year. May it be full of rest and laughter and plenty of time with the ones you love. And please come visit! We would love to show you all the best playgrounds in Lexington!
Love, Rowan & Evelyn